She carried a secret life inside her, a fragile hope growing with each passing day, only to have it shattered by betrayal in the harshest way. In the quiet hours of the morning, the truth crashed down like a storm, tearing apart the trust she once held sacred, leaving her to grapple with a husband she no longer recognized.
Caught between the devastation of infidelity and the weight of impending motherhood, she faces a heartbreaking choice. The man who once promised forever now pleads for forgiveness, but she knows that some wounds run too deep, and the only way forward is to break free from the past and reclaim her own future.
My husband cheated on me. I don’t think I want to go on with pregnancy
As renowned researcher Dr. Brené Brown explains, “Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously.” This situation starkly illustrates a violation of relational boundaries, not just through infidelity, but through the subsequent manipulation of shared life events.
The husband’s actions—the affair itself, followed by publicizing the pregnancy to apply external pressure—demonstrate a profound lack of respect for the wife’s autonomy during a vulnerable time. His emotional display (crying and begging) can be interpreted as coercive behavior, shifting the focus from his betrayal to the wife’s potential role as the ‘villain’ if she chooses to leave. The wife’s desire for a ‘clean cut’ is a healthy, protective response aimed at minimizing future entanglement, recognizing that trust has been irreparably broken.
The OP’s actions to seek separation are entirely appropriate given the violation of trust and the subsequent coercive tactics used by her husband. Moving forward, she should prioritize legal counsel and maintain clear, firm communication about the separation terms, ensuring that decisions regarding the pregnancy and family notification are made solely on her terms, regardless of her husband’s emotional demands.
THE COMMENTS SECTION WENT WILD – REDDIT HAD *A LOT* TO SAY ABOUT THIS ONE.
The opening salvo in using the pregnancy (and, should it come to it, the child) against you in any way he can. Don’t let him. NTA.
The original poster is experiencing profound shock and betrayal early in her pregnancy, leading her to immediately question the future of her marriage. Her husband’s immediate reaction, coupled with his subsequent public disclosure of the pregnancy to family to pressure her into staying, directly conflicts with her stated desire for separation and self-preservation.
Considering the immediate emotional devastation and the husband’s attempt to use the pregnancy disclosure as leverage, the central question remains: Is it ever justifiable for one partner to reveal significant personal news to extended family without consent specifically to manipulate the other partner into remaining in a compromised relationship?
